Interview with Maria Furball

The Daily Squeaker is very happy to inform you that we were able to get an interview with Maria Furball; the actress that went missing. Maria will be accompanied to the interview by a Hamstervill police officer so she won’t spill any unnecessary beans.

Reporter: How do you feel?

Maria: Ok, actually.

Reporter: Can you give us your side of the story?

Maria: Yes, well I was stepping outside to get a breath of fresh air after the director told us we would be filming the last scene that day. Then suddenly I saw a flash of white and I could no longer see. When I tried to scream someone clamped their hand over my mouth and said something. I don’t remember what they said but the voice reminded me of Samanda; a fellow actress of mine.

Police Officer: (Clears throat, and gives Maria a look)

Reporter: And then?

Police Officer: That is classified information that is not ready to give to the public. If you have any more questions please proceed, or we will be getting back to the police headquarters.

Reporter: That will be all Officer, I hope we will be able to get another interview with Maria when the story is no longer “CLASSIFIED”.

Hilda Pine-Tree, Author of the “Sea Rodent” series is coming to Hamstervill!

Hilda Pine-Tree, the author of the “Sea Rodent” Series, is coming to Hamstervill for a book signing event in the Main Library branch! The Daily Squeaker is very happy that we were able to get an interview with her! Hilda will be coming to the interview with her sister, Emily.

Reporter: Where were you born?

Hilda: In Rattington.

Reporter: Where do you live now?

Hilda: Volington.

Reporter: Are you a vole?

Hilda: Yes.

Reporter: What inspired the “Sea Rodent”?

Hilda: I don’t know, I’ve been dreaming up stories forever.

Reporter: When did you start?

Hilda: I think I was in 4th Grade, I had the idea while taking the end-of-year Common Nut Test.

Reporter: For rodents who don’t know, what are the “Sea Rodent” Books about?

Hilda: The Sea Rodents are a family of voles that live by the coast; each book describes one year.

Reporter: What are some things that happen to them?

Hilda: Pirate attacks, food shortages, etc.

Reporter: Thank you for this interview, Hilda!

Hilda: Thanks for having me!

Bank Robbery!

In the city of New Prairie Town, rodents were shocked to find out that the “Bank of Hamstington'' was robbed possibly by its own employees! We talk to the head banker, Mr. Strictfur.

Reporter: Good afternoon, sir.

Mr. Strictfur: Yes.

Reporter: Please explain the robbery….

Mr. Strictfur: Yesterday evening, I was locking up the bank for the night, when one of my employees came running up, panting, saying “He had forgotten his jacket inside his office. Naturally, I unlocked the door to let him back in. I was waiting outside when someone/something hit me on the head, and I suspect my employee to have done it.

Reporter: But wasn’t your employee inside?

Mr. Strictfur: Correct, but after he went inside I turned around (so I was facing the street, not the inside of the building). He could have knocked me out from behind.

Reporter: So what happened next?

Mr. Strictfur: Well, I woke up and locked the door and went to the police station...and the rest is history. Detective Amy Gerbilia is currently working on the case. Many things are still confidential.

Strange new fortune teller in Hamstervill!

Ms. Lizaria is Hamstervill’s new fortune teller, and it is also rumored that she can read paws, claws, and tea leaves. She appeared in Hamstervill a week ago (July 14) and has since started a business on Main street. We interviewed a customer to find out why she is so strange. Here is our interview with Amy W., a guinea pig living in a houseboat on the Carrot River.

Reporter: When did you visit Ms. Lizaria?

Amy W: July 19.

Reporter: How did you hear about her?

Amy W: A friend of mine saw one of her posters.

Reporter: Why did you go?

Amy W: Don’t you ever want to know a fortune?

Reporter: Can you describe your experience?

Amy W: Well, I waited in the waiting room for about half an hour, when Ms. Lizaria called me in. I entered a dark room, and Ms. Lizaria in the far right corner across from me.

Reporter: What did she look like?

Amy W: She was wearing a metallic, sparkling, dark blue turban with silver stars.

Reporter: What did you do next?

Amy W: I sat down on the sparkly metallic green cushioned chair she was pointing at.

Reporter: And then?

Amy W: She gazed into a crystal ball and started to mutter something.

Reporter: What happened next?

Amy W: I can’t tell you, Ms. Lizaria’s only rule was that I never tell her what she told me.

Reporter: And if I tell you what she was doing was illegal?

Amy W: A promise is a promise.

Reporter: Thank you for this interview. (Said with sarcasm)

Amy W: Thank you for having me. (Said in very sweet voice)

Lemmings in danger!

Coyotes have been spotted near Lemmingvill, rodents are in a panic, see interview for more information or visit the Lemmingvill town website: lemmingvill-town-info.com.

Reporter: Good afternoon Ann Rodentia. Thank you for volunteering to do an interview about the situation in Lemmington.

Ann Rodentia: Thank you for having me.

Reporter: Do you know what the panic in Lemmingvill is about?

Ann Rodentia: Yes, a pack of coyotes was spotted near Lemmingvill a couple days ago, and has been seen regularly since.

Reporter: Who raised the alarm?

Ann Rodentia: I’m not quite sure, Mr. Apple-Batter might have seen it first and alerted the village.

Reporter: Do you think rodents should worry about the coyotes?

Ann Rodentia: Yes.

Reporter: Has Lemmington ever had coyote issues?

Ann Rodentia: No, the last coyote pack was seen around Lemmington in 1999.

Reporter: Do you live in Lemmington?

Ann Rodentia: Yes.

Reporter: Are you a lemming?

Ann Rodentia: No, I’m a gerbil.

Reporter: How did your family come to Lemmington?

Ann Rodentia: I moved here. My family lives in Gerbil Town.

Reporter: Thank you for sharing your opinion and story about the situation in Lemmington!

Today we did a "question & answer" session with Ms. Squirrel, Squirrel Village’s baker.

Q: What is your job?

A: Village Baker.

Q: Do you like your job?

A: Yes.

Q: Do you find it stressful?

A: Almost never.

Q: Have you ever entered a contest?

A: No, but I’m thinking of entering the county wide contest next week.

Q: Favorite color …?

A: Orange.

Q:Favorite food …?

A: What do you think? I’m a squirrel, so nuts. I prefer roasted nuts with salt to plain nuts.

Q:Favorite drink …?

A: Hot chocolate with hazelnuts.

Q: How long have you been a Baker?

A: I started professionally as soon as I finished 8th Grade, but I’ve been baking since I was 5.

Q: How old are you?

A: I’m not going to answer that!!!

Q: What inspired you to become a Baker?

A: The village bakery was run by a lady by the name of Mrs. GreyMouse. She was always nice to me and let me help out when she needed help. Later, I went there every afternoon after school, and she taught me everything she knew about baking. I was devastated when she moved away, but we stayed in touch and I was able to convince her to come back. She did and she stayed here till she died.

Detective Capybara: Top 3 Mysteries

A note from Detective Capybara: The first case is the hardest I ever solved, the second one is the first case I ever had, and the third one I never solved.

1. Mrs. Woodmouse came to me once, saying she had a mystery that needed solving. She said she had heard something come into her house, and the next day she had noticed that most of her silver was gone. That night she heard the sound again, this time she followed it and it was coming from a portrait that had been painted of a summer meadow. The sound was a cross between a moan and a wail, sometimes loud and sometimes soft. The next day she realized that a window on the third floor was open and broken and her mother's pearl necklace was gone. She insisted that I solve it, not another detective.

I knew that the sound that she was talking about could be a ghost, but the sound could also be produced when rubbing together the right types of metal. Mrs. Woodmouse had a large tree close to her house, and it was possible that whoever was stealing was using that window as an entrance and exit. When I asked Mrs. Woodmouse how long the window had been broken, she said she did not know “We don’t really use the 3rd floor, so we rarely go up there, the window could have been broken for months.” The part that bothered me most about the case was that Mrs. Woodmouse didn’t really seem to be worried. That part seemed to suggest that she may have hidden the necklace, so I asked her if it was possible that she had misplaced the necklace, she answered, “No, it’s not very likely. I keep it in my room in a small drawer, I never take it out except to clean it every month. And I cleaned it on July 1.” “What if one of your children took it out to play with?” I asked. “No we have a very strict rule, nobody takes out or touches the necklace without supervision.”

I insisted on searching the house (it took 3 weeks) and found many promising leads (e.g. the maid had worked a lot with metal and had just left), I still didn’t understand if the noise Mrs. Woodmouse had heard whether it was a ghost or not. I solved the case by accident when I was leaving the house one day, one of Mrs. Woodmouses children was playing in the hallway, she tripped and stood up unharmed (though she had just fallen face forward onto rough asphalt), as I helped her stand up my arm when through hers; she was a ghost. At that moment I understood how the case fit together. The house was home to a ghost, since Mrs. Woodmouse was unable to lie; she had the ghost act out the scene with her. She then had the maid leave and gave her the silver and the pearl necklace, and came to the police station. She didn’t realize the window on the 3rd floor was open until the day she came to the police station, but it fit in perfectly into her plan that she decided to include it.

2. Samantha Pine-Tree came into the police station one day claiming that her purse had been stolen. She said it had happened on Main Street, “a white rat was walking behind me and suddenly I felt my purse being tugged out of my hand, I think it was the white rat”. The description seemed to describe Furball Ratty (currently still on the run) perfectly, but before I jumped to that conclusion I asked “What hand did you hold your purse with when it was stolen?” “My right one” “So Furball Ratty would have grabbed it with his right hand as well?” “Correct.” “That is not possible Furball Ratty lost the use of his right hand when he was 3 in an accident, that means either you still have your purse or another white rat stole it”. At that she confessed that it had all been a plot to land Furball Ratty in jail, Furball Ratty at that time had only done minor crimes so was not yet wanted in jail.

3. “The castle of the queen was attacked!” Screamed all the headlines! I was responsible to solve the case, who or what and how had attacked the living space of the Queen of Hamstington. The attacker could not be a ghost since the castle had defensive spells everywhere against them. It could not be a guard for they were sworn to protect their queen, if they broke that (as the Queen of Hearts would Say “Off with Their heads!”)... I was stumped. I worked on the case for more than a year, but I never ever found a clue, not one! So at last I was forced to admit that the case seemed unsolvable!